I read this link today from the Advocate:
http://www.advocate.com/commentary/2013/09/20/op-ed-i-want-my-dad-finally-come-out
My heart broke in many pieces reading the writings of this gay man's child.
I saw myself and yes, even the pain of my ex and kids in many of the paragraphs, the pain that is felt between the lines. Quite honestly when my ex-wife told me that I was not only hurting her (I had known that for a long time) but that the kids were also being hurt with all of the mess we were causing I couldn't handle it anymore and decided it was time to come out---in many ways even at the price paid, things never got as bad as the article.
Often times as parents we think we're protecting others from pain and misery, but in reality I think I was trying to protect myself. I can't say it was easy, I can't say it wasn't painful--there have been few if anything more painful than separating, not being able to tuck my kids in bed every night and be there for their waking up time, but after many years I can say it has been worth it.
Any Moho (and non) contemplating marrying a woman for the sake of family, society, church or themselves ought to read this and consider where will their life be down the road.
Word....
Exactly!!!!!!!! The same article affected me in the same way. Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteI haven't read the article but let me guess...keeping the secret from the child did not keep the child from figuring it out -instead- what happened was the child knew it was a family secret not to be talked about thereby forcing the child into a closet of his or her own; all alone, unable to speak to even a parent about what was going on. Am I right?
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